To ask for help or to make it look like we know it all?
It’s Week 3 of the Change Challenge! Here’s a recap of our process thus far:
We’ve said, “No! We’re not immune to change!”
We’ve set a growth goal to lead us into 2021.
We’ve inventoried and named all the things we are doing OR are not doing instead of charging at our growth goal.
This week we’ll use our most recent reflection to unearth the competing or hidden commitments that shape our undermining behaviors and stop our progress on goals.
Together, we are looking for anxieties, worse-case-scenarios, unhelpful pride-points and patterns of self-protection. Start your reflection by putting yourself in the worry-zone.
If you were to do the OPPOSITE of each of your doing/not doing list… what would that look like? AND, what would you be worried about if you did it?
Push yourself to really envision what you’d do instead.
Notice the feelings creeping into your mind or gut that make you uncomfortable
Seek to name the thing you would really hate for others to see in you OR the way you’d least like to see yourself.
Put these feelings and intuitive reflections into words: they are your competing or hidden commitments.
Let’s walk through this reflection with Clintel:
Clintel, if you were to do the OPPOSITE of everything your currently doing / not doing list, what would that look like?
I would be comfortable decentering myself from my work. I would define success by how I feel and what has been done, not by whether or not I’m awarded or given a promotion.
I would take the time to engage in dialogue about my work with others. I would be open to questions, feedback and praise.
I would represent my whole self and celebrate the diversity in my interests, talents and skills. I would see myself as worthy to talk about.
What worries come up for you when you imagine doing all of these things?
Being mediocre/average.
My work isn’t changing lives or the world for better - just good talking points for donors or nonprofit leaders to discuss.
Not being fully seen.
Not being humble.
Taking all that in - what are your commitments in tension with fully investing in and celebrating your growth without guilt?
I’m committed to excelling at what I do and exceeding the expectations of others.
I’m committed to embodying humility, which to me means I shouldn’t brag about or discuss my accomplishments
